Top 19 Ways To Annoy Other People
- Leave the copy machine set to reduce 150%, dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
- In the memo field of all of your checks, write "for sensual massage".
- Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
- Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up".
- Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think".
- Practice making fax and modem noises.
- Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
- Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophecy".
- Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
- Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green and insist to others that you "like it that way".
- Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
- As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
- Ask people what gender they are.
- While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
- Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
- Sing along at the opera.
- Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
- Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles".
- Send this list to everyone in your e-mail address book even if they sent it to you or ask you not to send things like this.
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